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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Manners are still required around pregnant women.

It's shocking how some people think that just because you're pregnant they can ask personal questions and make very bold assumptions. If you used to be a size 4 and suddenly can barely see your knees, you really don't want someone asking you if you are having twins or try to guess how far along you are. 7 months? Almost there? No, 5. This woman in particular was an overzealous Chinese w0man. I would estimate she was about 4'10" and around 90 pounds. I am 5'8" and I can promise you at this point I weigh a lot more than 90 pounds. Please lady, I'm not going to be your friend if you only make me feel more like a cow. Go away, please. If you ever want to comment on a pregnant woman's body, just don't. Unless you want to say, "YOU LOOK AMAZING!" That is an acceptable compliment. Saying she doesn't even look pregnant can also be offensive because pregnant women that don't show are worried about their baby being too small or undernourished. It's best to just keep your mouth shut. :)
Another personal favorite of mine is the breastfeeding question. I really do not think it is anyone's business what I choose to do with my breasts, or my vagina for that matter. Asking questions to a stranger about labor methods or giving unsolicited advice based on your own experience giving birth fifty years ago is just not helpful. Also, I don't care to know whether or not you took pain medications, got cut up "down there", or just opted for a c-section to avoid "stretching". I literally cringe when people I do not know or do not care for tell me their horror stories or try to impose their beliefs on me. Hippie lady, if my baby and I want to get doped up for delivery it's our deal! Stuck-up blonde lady, no I probably don't agree that scheduled c-sections are the way to go. And PLEASE. Most important of all. If you are not pregnant or do not have children, please do not give any advice or tips whatsoever. I do not care what your sister did, what your neighbor read, or what you think. If you are not a mother and can speak from experience, anything that comes out of your mouth is useless and annoying.
I don't have to say again how big of a NO-NO it is to ask a pregnant woman you do not know if you can touch her stomach. It's invasive and obnoxious to assume. Also, I guarantee my baby will not kick for you.
And lastly, some couples prefer to not disclose their chosen baby names for a reason. People of course have opinions about what you should or should not name your child. I can promise you that this is also not welcome commentary. Don't ask and then scrunch up your nose or offer another name.

Thanks so much for your time.

Pregnant Women Everywhere

* note- this does not apply to my friends and family members I like.


Kirsten said...

You should post this on Craigslist - it would totally make best of.

Todd said...

Sounds like someone needs a cookie

Leann said...

Stop over reacting and chill prego... I think its nice that people want to talk to you. Their intentions are in the right place besides the crazys it just conversation. A conversation that can go in to many different areas and directions. BE NICE!

Valeria said...

Haha! I know most people have nice intentions so I'm nice right back. This post is meant as a sort of joke with some truth in it. And trust me, a lot of preggers feel the same way :)

BunBun said...

sing it sister!

BunBun said...

Hey I have an idea. Next time a smelly ol china comes up to know asking personal questions..or attempts to touch you...just scream "BITCH PLEASE". Hey I would totally do that! Ugh I can only imagine all the lame people and their lame ass stfu comments. I think I wouldn’t be so nice to the smelly ones.

Leann said...


oj said...

I agree with Todd!