Spring is near!

The munchkin got her first Easter bunny from her great-grandma Daphne! She loved it instantly, she loves all soft and furry things. Tragically, the bunny had to be taken away shortly after. Tufts of bunny fur came out in her hands and she puts everything in her mouth so it had to go away until she is a little bit older. I am pretty sure she is over it already.

Tzute

Three of my best girlfriends recently went on a South American trip and brought me back some goodies. They went to Guatemala, Argentina, and Brazil. One of my friends brought Olivia an adorable little handwoven outfit that will be perfect for summer. Another friend brought me Brazilian Vogue and best of all a beautiful baby carrier called a tzute. I had never heard of these, but I told her to bring me one of the handmade carriers the native women wear. These textiles are used for a variety of things and not just for babywearing! It is so beautiful and colorful and the carry is similar to a ring sling but in my opinion a lot more comfortable. Here are my first attempts of wearing the pea in it, but now I have a better idea of how it works. Thank you, Karina!

Thankful Thursday

I am thankful for my sister because she is everything I am not. She makes me stop and think sometimes that maybe I need to take a step back and realize that being nice is always better. She is a constant reminder that a big heart never hardens. No one loves like Paloma does. Although she is three years younger than me, she has always been my trusty sidekick and strongest advocate. Everyone who knows her knows that she never goes first, she always waits, and she always smiles. She is compassionate and funny. Now that Olivia is around, she still continues to share her love and her tenderness. The baby sees her and her eyes light up. I would give my life for her if she promised me she'd live it fully. Sometimes I envy her sensitivity and empathy and other times they annoys me. I want her to be tougher, more selfish, more forward. I know that even though I always try to teach her lessons, I still have yet to learn hers. I cannot imagine having a more devoted friend or a more honest confidant. Her future husband and kids have no idea how lucky they are going to be.

The other lullabies make her cry.

My kid prefers to go to bed with a soundtrack made by moi.

Olivia Lullaby #1

How did you change?

Everyone talks about how motherhood changes you. I cannot believe how true it is. I was just talking to one of my best friends the other day, and she said that after meeting Olivia she realized how excited she is for the day she becomes a mother. And she also commented on knowing how completely altering parenthood must be. We are lucky as women to be able to truly feel what it is to create life. To see it grow, and twist, and become inside of you. Only a mother knows what it is to carry a child as a part of you for months, the heaviness of it in your bones and and in quiet thoughts. I really could not describe that part adequately, most likely no one can.

To the naked eye I am pretty much the same. I am still sarcastic, silly, and doubtful. My passions remain and I feel youthful. But now I go about my days differently. Every morning my day does not begin with me. The night falls and I am the last to go to sleep. Right now I exist to serve another, to cultivate another person. My biggest difference is that my center is no longer me. The middle of everything is now her and I am just hopefully and protectively pushing it along. Choices have many new considerations and ever decision is not so simple.

The second big difference is that I am softer in some parts and stronger in others. This statement is both figurative and literal. My determination is stronger, my purpose is stronger. My body is stronger and so is my backbone because I grew a human. My skin is softer and so is my spirit. I'm less cynical and more gentle because cynicism will age me. My heart is more tender because the sweetest part of the universe smiles at me when she wakes in the morning.

I baked.

I decided to bake a cake tonight. I like baking a lot more than cooking. I wonder if Todd loves me even more now because I baked for no reason. Yeah, probably. I made vanilla with vanilla frosting and unbirthday sprinkles. It is delicious because I used my mom's supersecret recipe ;-) The cake did not break when I flipped it over and I was so proud.

Have a Happy Saturday