Although I planned for a natural birth, I ended up with a c-section. I read the books, took the classes, and was mentally ready. The situation I ended up with was exactly what I did not want, and because our American hospitals do not respect the miracle of birth, I ended up having Olivia removed from my body. I was so doped up on pain meds I did not feel a thing while she came into the world. But, the pain afterward was the worst I have ever felt. Not only did it make breastfeeding a nightmare, it also made me dependent on Todd and my mother to even go to the bathroom. Honestly, I did not change Olivia's diaper by myself until she was about five days old. It was crippling. Before having a cesarean myself, I always disliked the idea of them. Birthing in such a sterile and cold setting is not what childbirth is about for me. Now that I have had a c-section, I am even more against unnecessary medical intervention. The shock and disgust that come over me when I hear women rave about them is hard to disguise. If I ever have another child, I will be having a home birth because this is the only way I will successfully have a vaginal birth after cesarean. Hospitals across the country are banning VBAC even for young and healthy women like myself. I am so thankful for my beautiful baby girl and the scar I have is a reminder of what my body can do but that still does not mean I do not feel I was robbed of bringing my child into the world how nature intended.
Here are some photos from the pea's birth day:
This is the day that we got to the hospital for an induction, she was born almost 36 hours later.
Very swollen from a constant IV drip
Surgery
A healthy and content baby with daddy (I was kept away from her until I "recovered" enough to feel my legs and go to my room)
Finally together again!
The pea
3 comments:
come to Idaho for a VBAC!! They still value what little freedom we have left, and Charlotte and the pea can be buddies! =) you wouldn't like the weather, though!! =)
But seriously, I think a VBAC home birth is a beautiful choice. Better hurry before cali makes home birth illegal; if they haven't already...
I think California is the most liberal of the states and there is no way we would allow them to take home birth away from us. And Val, thanks for finally sharing pictures :)
I love the photos! So amazaing!!! I wanted to just say that it's normal to feel sad or angry about your birth. It took me about 4-6 months to realize how upset I was about the way my birth went...and after a lot of thinking, writing and talking, it got harder and harder to accept for a little while. I swear every time I went to yoga and stretched my hips - i'd cry about the birth. It's okay to feel this way - there is not much else in life that is so amazing no matter how it happens....so don't be afraid to explore your feeling deeper about it...and know it's okay.
About the homebirth laws and such...California is pretty strict actually, I was planning on becoming a midwife and that's why we moved to Oregon...it's much easier here actually. And a VBAC would be amazing! I also hope that I have another baby so I can somehow "fix" the things that were wrong at Adelaide's birth...although my midwife says that it never happens that way?!
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