Running for fitness

I used to be an avid runner. I would run about 20-25 miles a week and I did it to stay in shape and also because it sort of becomes addicting. No other form of exercise gives me the feeling of elation that running does, and my body was always quick to see results. After six months of waiting for the rest of the baby weight to melt off on its own I decided it was time for me to get moving again. Instead of easing my way up to completing my 5-mile trail, I just sort of went for it. The first couple of times I would get tired easily and have to stop very frequently. Then, I began to feel my leg muscles rekindle their romance with feeling the burn. The last two times I went running I felt so fantastic. I can say that I had not felt so great in my own skin for a while. Now I look forward to my workout instead of dreading it. Another part of running that I enjoy is the mental release that it is for me. When I run, I am alone with my thoughts and I forget about everything else. My focus is on my goals, on finishing the hill, and on breathing right. My mind is cleared and am so relaxed afterward. I can honestly say that a glass of wine does not unwind me as completely as an hour of cardio.

Quick Post

The pea woke up with a goopy eye on Saturday. It seems to happen to her every so often. This time I squirted a little breast milk in it and voila! her eye went back to normal that same day. Reason number 435,664,654,345 why that stuff is just magical.

Also, I need to add a couple of things to Olivia's hobby list:
-Smearing baby food all over her chair so she can lick it up later
-Pulling mommy's hair
-Throwing her toys overboard and then staring down at them when she's in her crib as if they could rescue her
-Being worn on the back

-FEEDING HERSELF WHOLE GRAIN CHEERIOS! (Does anyone have an organic alternative?)
-Stealing from people's plates when no one notices as we sit around the dinner table
-The obsession with canines persists

-Story time with books with fun pictures and wrinkling the pretty pages
-Waking up at 5am crying :( Someone please tell me this phase is going to end. She had been sleeping so well and waking up happy. Are the teeth to blame?

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

I hope you were spoiled and loved because that is what you deserve!!
Lots of love,
Val

The Fuzz.

We got the Goodmama "Thing One" I ordered the other day and I love it. It is blue and fuzzy and outlandishly ridiculous. I have heard mixed reviews on the Goodmama Ones (it is a fitted diaper that does not need a cover because it have a hidden layer of waterproof PUL). I decided to get this one because I think it is so cute and wanted to give it a chance to prove me wrong. I put it on Olivia and she sat in it, drank some milk, and took a nap. About three+ hours later, no leaks! Hooray!

Lullabies

For the third installment of Olivia's lullaby playlist I decided to instead list some of the bands that I believe Olivia likes because either a.) They made her dance in my belly or b.) they relax her or put her to sleep now:
Portishead, particularly because Todd and I would listen to them a lot in the early months of our relationship, sharing a twin bed in a tiny downtown apartment. Beth Gibbons sang us to sleep.
Beach House, my bath music. Lots of baths were had when I was pregnant.
Deathcab for Cutie, nothing relaxed the pea more as a newborn than Deathcab.
Radiohead, a highly influential band for me and a staple of the lullaby playlist.
João Gilberto, I grew up listening to this man's voice. I can clearly remember watching my dad with such love as a child, his handsome face and a glass of wine. Bossa Nova will always be so meaningful to me.

My hope is that the pea will enjoy music as much as I have. Nothing can keep you company like your favorite album, there is no therapy like a song that brings you to a place no one else can go. It is such an outlet and a release. In retrospect, I wish I would have had speakers in that awful operation room when Olivia was born. Perhaps Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.

I will do the rest later. Good night :)

"Who are you?"

My daughter has recently decided that 5am is an appropriate time for waking up in the morning. Not only does she wake, she wakes us with a bang! Kicking the copper bars of her crib, throwing her paci, or thumping her feet loudly on the mattress. In other words, she wants us to wake up. My brain still remembers the sleep deprived neurosis of a new mother and I always wake up quickly. I gather her up and bring her to bed or I feed her. Sometimes she wants nothing to do with either of these things and I finally find myself sitting on the couch and the sun is slowly starting to rise.
This morning I started having a moment as I was waiting for the sun to come up, a moment that reminded me of the scene from The Breakfast Club when Anthony Michael Hall's nerdy character is trying to write the group's detention paper. This leads to him question who he is, he searches for labels. So I sat asking myself the question, "Who am I?" Not in a lost way, or with any panic. I have known who I am for quite a while but now I am a mother also so where does that leave me? Olivia consumes every aspect of me right now and yet I have to make plans for the future and begin university applications. How am I going to publish a book by the time I am 30 if I cannot sit at the computer and type anything? My MS word documents stay blank, the cursor blinking and mocking me.
Then, the pea stirs and I remember she is sleeping in my lap. I stare at her delicate face: the perfect curve of her nose, the pout of her lips, and the way her long eyelashes grace her chubby cheeks. I am so overwhelmed with devotion. My heart fills with warmth and then it all comes back to me. She is my purpose, she will lead me in the path I need to go. The ultimate muse is a part of me and with her my inspiration grows. My Olivia was the answer all along.

Thankful Thursday

Caffeine